He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
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