so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
accomplished twins. life is a go
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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