I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Randomize
