so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize