Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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