Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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