So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
