Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
