She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
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