If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize