oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Randomize
