If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
