we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize