tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize