I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Randomize
