This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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