hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Randomize
