I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
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