So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
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