we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
