you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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