Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
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