That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
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