Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
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