please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
