Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
P.S. I can't hear my feet
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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