If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize