you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
The adults are the big ones right?
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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