I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
