i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
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