You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize