What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
