Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
