Texts From Last Night

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  (213): View more from California

  he quoted Bring It On. It's over.

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  (213): he quoted Bring It On. It's over. http://tfl.nu/r2ms
  Replies (10) Good night (784) Bad night (2500)
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  (619): View more from California

  3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.

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  (619): 3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact. http://tfl.nu/7spk
  Replies (20) Good night (2384) Bad night (748)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book

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  (813): Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book http://tfl.nu/eyxq
  Replies (12) Good night (2759) Bad night (628)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  They have a pepper shaker for pot.

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  (248): They have a pepper shaker for pot. http://tfl.nu/nws4
  Replies (8) Good night (4528) Bad night (926)
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.

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  (952): my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck. http://tfl.nu/zv2o
  Replies (17) Good night (1442) Bad night (4247)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.

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  (541): Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing. http://tfl.nu/0c84
  Replies (10) Good night (3903) Bad night (694)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."

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  (216): Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect." http://tfl.nu/19ko
  Replies (9) Good night (3024) Bad night (838)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'

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  (713): Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly' http://tfl.nu/5ixk
  Replies (5) Good night (3557) Bad night (773)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.

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  (919): What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic. http://tfl.nu/uq7x
  Replies (19) Good night (3010) Bad night (564)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.

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  (303): He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night. http://tfl.nu/mkun
  Replies (7) Good night (761) Bad night (1303)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.

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  (215): It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater. http://tfl.nu/563x
  Replies (5) Good night (363) Bad night (1320)
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  (408): View more from California

  Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.

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  (408): Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher. http://tfl.nu/o3bs
  Replies (3) Good night (535) Bad night (359)
• Favorite

  (561): View more from Florida

  He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.

  (770): View more from Georgia

  So it may have been laced, sue me.

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  (561): He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming. (770): So it may have been laced, sue me. http://tfl.nu/joyn
  Replies (1) Good night (501) Bad night (237)
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.

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  (740): Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people. http://tfl.nu/9aw0
  Replies (6) Good night (512) Bad night (174)
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  (956): View more from Texas

  I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.

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  (956): I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night. http://tfl.nu/cx0y
  Replies (1) Good night (201) Bad night (151)

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