Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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