what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Randomize
