True but thats because hes a fetus.
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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