Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Randomize
