I feel great
I just peed on a car
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
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