I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
