its not stalking. its research.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
