found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
