i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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