In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Randomize
