I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
this just has baby written all over it
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Randomize
