But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Randomize