I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize
