My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
