I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Randomize
