your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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